Dear Mr. Chad OchoCinco,

I know that it has been rough week, so GetRealFootball wanted to reach out.  Your week started out fine but in the end, you were in a familiar mess, they tried to trade you unsuccessfully and then were cut from the possibly the greatest sports organization in any league over the last decade, and on top of that you were signed for the veterans minimum to a team that has 3 no-names as WR’s and possibly a fresh rook as the QB.  It doesn’t help that HBO will be in your face for the entire offseason, with cameras everywhere, pleading for drama and hoping that you deliver off the field.  Chad, These names should scare you, Brian Hartline, Clyde Gates and Julius Pruitt.

Do you know who these guys are?

These guys are you new and unproven wide receiving corps, I wanted to get this introduction out of the way before you see each other in the locker room and mistake one of them for a towel boy or assistant coach. 

To say the least Chad, you are in one big ‘ol Catch-22, you are in an illogical set of circumstances with a measure or policy whose effect is the opposite of what was intended.  By the way, that is what a Catch-22 IS.

But lets be real Chad, free agency and the NFL is a nasty, dirty and violent game with serious consequences, your future with this team is limited but I do see some potential for you Chad. You could get 80 catches (you had 15 last year) and make another million dollars on top of your $925,000 vets salary or you could impart some clever ways to get fined to your young and impressionable WR corps or even lead to the league in non-violent fines again!  The world of Miami, is your oyster, you can choose your own adventure there. You can make this last NFL stop your own; you can design it how you wish.
I have a deal for you Chad, if you get in the end zone more than once, and you do a lot of celebration dances and clever “fine worthy” partying, lets agree that this is your last year.  Go out with a bang, Bruh?

Sincerely,

Mike Komrosky@GetRealFootball.com

Disgruntled Pats Fan

PS. I heard through the grapevine, that the Dolphins are letting you keep the #85, that’s good for you, it would look really strange and confusing for us if your name was OchoCinco BUT your number was anything else.  Good Luck.